LOLs AND HEARTBREAKS

I have come to the conclusion lately that nothing locks me in the Writers’ Block more than a clueless government.

It unnerves me more than the prospect of having a Botox-made Dictator with a harem of Female virgin bodyguards.

While I would love to ‘thank’ the PDP-led Government for distinguishing itself as the Primus Inter Pares of all my ‘many inspirations’ (would I rant if they were nice?), I dare say that the same Government is the source of my protracted Writers’ Block!

Ever heard of information overload? Ever wondered why, the same water that all Living Beings need to survive (to the best of my knowledge) turns out to be their death once it exceeds the threshold of supply.

Each time I try to start another piece; another incident just succeeds in overtaking it. From the Olebode George (deliberately mis-spelt, go figure) thanksgiving service to the re-arrest of a Gubernatorial candidate who just got granted bail on the grounds that the current Inspector General of Police is either dumb, arrogant, stupid or a combination of all for not understanding the Maxim semper necessitas probandi incumbit ei qui agit (the necessity of proof always lies with the person who lays charges).

For someone being charged for Treason and Murder, as it is in the case of Senator Akpan Udoedehe, the Gubernatorial Candidate in Akwa-Ibom under the platform of ACN (Action Congress of Nigeria), which, if convicted, attracts the maximum penalty of a DEATH SENTENCE, the least you should do, Mr Dumbo, is gather false-witnesses and photoshopped pictures to at least substantiate your claim.

At least Justice Ibrahim Auta, the culprit in Ken Saro Wiwa’s Judicially-obtained-licence-to-murder case, backed up his point by attributing his sentence to a statement allegedly made by Ken (and for those of you who do not know, this Auta dude just got elevated to the post of the Acting Chief Judge of the Federal High Court).

Nigerians love pictures, perhaps more than the Chinese. A cannibal gets arrested and in a minute, emergency almanacs pop-up and sell very fast.

I guess Engineer Rauf Aregbesola was wise in not showing up when a similar incident happened in Osun State in the wake of the 2007 elections. The not-so-long-ago-sacked Governor, Olagunsoye Oyinlola had declared Aregbesola wanted following the outbreak of post-election violence; perhaps Uncle Hafiz is a tad more devoted than his predecessors; how else would you explain arresting someone who just got granted bail with the deployment of 50 Mobile Policemen citing ‘Orders from above’.

Nigeria must be a very Godly Nation…too many ‘Gods’ giving orders from ‘above’ and these ‘Gods’ are inundated with pantheons of personal Al-Nabi.

Now here’s the update: After the Federal High Court granted him bail and he was re-arrested, Udoedehe got paraded before a Magistrate Court in Uyo, where the Chief Magistrate, Edet Obot admitted he lacked jurisdiction in such matters, but would remand the accused in Prison Custody! That is based on a ‘NEW LAW’ (Criminal Procedure Amendment Law passed into law by the Akwa Ibom State House of Assembly on March 31st 2011 - Note that the crime was allegedly committed on March 22^nd ) on the instance of the incumbent Governor Godswill Akpabio which empowers the governor to jail anyone for up to 14 days without trial! Nigeria is indeed inundated with ‘Gods’!

As I write, there is another Federal High Court Ruling ordering the unconditional release of the accused but Brother Hafiz is still dragging his feet; by the way, how come I am sooo uncomfortable with a man whose name is RIGim???

On the day the Parliamentary elections were to hold, a PontiusPilatic (another from the Rantimus Dictionary) situation was brewing in far away Dubai. James Onanefe Ibori, who was held in Dubai over a grievous money laundering charge, and could not be extradited to the United Kingdom because of a convenient Real Estate Fraud charge which keeps him in the United Arab Emirates until it is ‘resolved’, suddenly gets released on ‘humanitarian’ grounds on account of failing health! Talk about the release of Barabbas by Pontius Pilate! I have heard people say ‘At least he’s not permitted to come back to Nigeria’; Big Deal!

Bernie Madoff must be regretting he is not Nigerian! With a projected release date of November 14, 2139 (don’t laugh) which may be commuted on account of ‘good behaviour’ , I wonder how he’d feel reading about how his ‘Nigerian counterparts’ fared.

There is something about election dates that unnerves me. Let’s play with some superstition here. April 19 2003, does it ring a bell? That, as well as April 12^th was the date of the Second Election season in this Fourth Republic. The Presidential/Gubernatorial elections took place on the 19^th. Now, write April 19 2003 in the MM/DD/YY format, what do you get? 041903. Indeed, the election turned out to be a 419 (by now you should be used to what 419 is; it’s a steep learning curve if you don’t!) election. That was when Election Rigging in Nigeria attained a Platinum status! I call it Nigeria’s Rigging Golden Age.

Well, the 2007 was already branded do-or-die; so it was already Done-Dead-on Arrival, there is no need to be Parabolic about that.

Fast-forward to 2011 and someone decides to fix an election on the date of the April Fool’s Aftermath! What do you expect then?

I would not join those calling for Attahiru Jega’s head, but I am of the strong opinion that his head is hanging loosely on his neck. For a University Don who had risen to the post of Vice-Chancellor (I refuse to brood on the outcome of having two University Dons as President and Vice-President from 2007 till the death of one in 2010) I do not know what to make of the ‘logistics’ issue that eventually led to the April 2^nd botched Parliamentary elections. Is there more to it than he is telling? Time will tell what JEGA’s not telling.

The wanton show of shame from the Judiciary calls for despair. If a man can be locked up for ‘insulting a State Governor’ over the Social media and following the outcry that necessitated his release, hounded till he and his father fled the State, if a Governor can order ‘Detention without Trial’ at the time the Specter of Abu Ghraib and Guantanamo Bay still haunts America’s soul, if the Judiciary can be used to elongate the tenures of those who stole mandates..

I wonder if this does not bring back the very words of Major Kaduna Nzeogwu the enigmatic revolutionary a lot of Nigerians love to hate: “IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO VOTE OUT A NIGERIAN MINISTER”

I still have faith in the polls. I salute the efforts of my friends who have made software applications that enable a Corporate-Vigilante approach towards election monitoring.

The question remains, in the likely circumstance that the Will of the people is subverted once more, HOW FAR ARE WE WILLING TO GO?

President Goodluck Jonathan has promised that the Nigerian youth will LOL soon; so I welcome you all to a season of LOLs and Heartbreaks!

THE LOTUS-EATERS (CONCLUDED)

(Continued from previous post)

I read the papers some days ago. Over a decade after the Zaki-Biam massacre, the then President Olusegun Obasanjo says he only responded to the then governor George Akume’s request to deploy troops.

How about the massacre in Odi, where livestock were not spared like someone was trying to outperform King Saul a la Agag (The Bible, I Samuel 15) ? Okay, the Governor was ‘punished’ for not responding on time! *insert deep sigh here*

This is where I get conveniently infuriated. Recall the 9/11 terrorist attack on the United States even the Pentagon attempt failed, but the flyers of two CIVILIAN planes rammed the planes into the twin-towers of the World Trade Centre and CIVILIANS perished!

The Generals in Rayfield, Jos are living fat and secure while civilians are dying in droves. I wonder if this same lethargy would persist if the home of one of the Generals goes down in flames with attendant causalities!

If the problem is just some ‘political machination’, why are places of worship being targeted? And if it is just religious, why go for those on the lower end of the ‘Religious Food Chain’?

How on earth would herdsmen hold down a village for Four Hours of sustained genocide? Exactly WHY DO WE STILL HAVE A GOVERNMENT? Who gave the guns (oops, my bad, BOMBS!) to the Fulani Herdsmen? Why would a Dan Fulani nomad leave his highly treasured Cattle to unleash terror on Human Beings? Would you call that ‘land-dispute’ or a grouse with Governor Jonah Jang? Since when did a nomad start giving a hoot about who governs the State?

Full blown massacres erupt from something as minuscule and equally ridiculous as ‘A Christian Woman Crossing a Barricaded Street’ and no one bothers to ask if there is more than meets the eye?

The Boko Haram remains a constant threat, from the September 7, 2010 Bauchi Prison Break, where 721 Prisoners were unleashed on the society, including 150 members of the Boko-Haram, pockets of sustained attack from alleged members of this sect has spiked in the North and if care is not taken, it is only a question of time before these ‘pockets of violence’ cross the River Niger to become infernal bags that would engulf the entire nation.

Kidnappers had a field day in Lagos during the 2010 yuletide; you don’t know any of the victims, so you can’t be bothered. A couple of days ago, a man was cut down by suspected kidnappers and after taking the pains of rushing him to the hospital, the hospital refused to treat him because ‘it’s a gunshot wound and they need Police Report’ seriously, WHAT HAVE WE BECOME?

The Boko Haram is offering a truce to the Federal Government under its own terms, how magnanimous!

Even our Government is under hostage and no one wants to admit it. Making deals with ‘Militants’, negotiating with Arsonists and planning to ‘rescue’ the South-West from Rascals.

Honestly, the current Powers do not insult our intelligence in any way, not at all; THEY DO NOT EVEN BELIEVE WE HAVE ANY!

A country that did not hesitate to bring back her citizens caught in the uprising in Egypt but do not even bother that people are dying in droves on the home-front. The man mentioned earlier bled to death because the hospitals needed a ‘Police Report’. Since we pay the Police for vehicle tint permits, won’t Nigerians start seriously considering an ‘Advance Police Permit’ in anticipation of gunshot wounds? Just leave the date column for someone to fill on your behalf!

A pregnant lady was shot dead by the Police in the Mpape suburb of Abuja and all we hear is the cliché ‘accidental discharge’ , same line that has been in use since the mass elimination of Igbo officers far back 1966 in retaliation for the Northern causalities of the January 1966 revo-hijacked-coup-d’etat. Pardon my ignorance, please, HAS THE SAFETY LOCK IN GUNS BEEN REMOVED? Apart from the tantrums of the mob, the razed Bank and cars in the Bank (which most likely would be covered by insurance), is there anything still on-going to stem this tide?!!!

The 2011 elections happen to be just a couple of months away; I do not intend to be a killjoy, but the fact that the younger crop of Nigerian voters had to wait for slogans like ‘Cool to Vote’ and offers like ‘Get-registered-and-have-a-chance-to-walk-with-a –celebrity- to- the- polling- booth’ , ‘show-your-freaking-voters-card-and-get-my-freaking-CD-and-attend-my-freaking-free-show’ makes me feel nothing less than 10 Mega-Barrels of bile out of sheer helplessness and frustration of how lost this generation apparently is.

Hordes of hypocrites who on one hand pay tribute to Chuck D of the Public Enemy fame but remain part of the system that ‘rested’ their careers. To these people, the legendary Fela Anikulapo Kuti is just a franchise. If you are in doubt, tell me why his son, Femi, who continued as a social critic hardly gets airplays on radio!

It’s my blog, innit? So I can say what I want. My video was turned down by ………(fill the blanks) for having a ‘Political Theme’ if you can connect the dots, filling the blank space would not be difficult at all.

I wish a lot of times, that I could crack skulls to get some brains open, (not literally, I dare warn) but then, it’s a numb generation, SPAWNS OF LOTUS EATERS!

THE LOTUS-EATERS

“…It is, therefore, with a brave heart, with confident hope, and with
faith in my unalterable destiny, that I go from this twilight into
the darkness, unshaken in my trust in the Providence of God that a
glorious dawn will come on the morrow…”

-Chief Obafemi Awolowo before the High Court before

Being sentenced for Treasonable Felony in September

11, 1963

If in the words of the Late Chief Awolowo, 1963 was a shift from twilight to darkness, I really wonder what I would describe some Forty-Seven years after.

The Pogrom in Jos, the graduation from Bows, Arrows and Daggers to guns and bombs that conveniently miss out a particular group, the irrepressible Hydra Headed Boko Haram whose strength, contrary to the norm spiked since their leader Ustaz Mohammed Yusuf was allegedly killed-in-transit, the emergence and spread of ransom demanding kidnappers all over the Country all serve as portent of even darker days to come.

The killings in Jos conveniently took a new dimension few months to the polls, about the time voters’ registration is set to commence, and up till now, there is a criminal silence on the part of the Government. Backtrack to February 1999, where the PDP convention took place in Jos, would such a thing have happened? The thanks that Jos gets for playing a significant role in the formation of Nigerian Democracy (however flawed it is) is the incessant deliberate attempt to wipe out its populace!

Jos is not a stranger to hosting Political Conventions, as a matter of fact. A brief read into Nigerian archives (the few ones you can find) points clearly that conventions have been held in this town since Nigerian Independence; that is actually beside the point.

What hurts is the pervading numbness of Nigerians in the face of an imminent implosion that threatens to consume everything in its way!

The problem with Jos is not the Jasawan (Hausa settlers) nor the native Anaguta, Berom and Afizere, it is not the Dan Fulanis nor of those giving guns to the Dan Fulani; APATHY is the problem!

Apathy on the part of the Islamic Clerics who go on air to condemn the violence, but do NOTHING to identify with the people in distress, apathy on the part of even the Christian Association of Nigeria who are ‘afraid to say anything to heat up the polity’ but leave gory pictures for website circulation, apathy on the people who never follow up the trial of the arrested culprits to ensure a thorough investigation is done. We don’t care, do we?

I had my Secondary education in Jos and I recall one incident out of many. Being a first timer in a Boarding School, an older relative, who was a class ahead of me, was placed in charge of my finances by my Mum. The ‘friend’ squandered my allowance and by the time the Term was over, I had nothing left. Either the School Authorities envisaged it or something; Junior Secondary I students were meant to go with the first Flight from Jos to Lagos.

By the time we got to the airport, both my flight ticket (which we usually submitted to the School Authorities upon resumption) and my boarding pass were ready, and I was good to go, but for one snag: I had to pay a Five (5) Naira airport tax (those were the days a Los-Jos-Los Return Ticket cost only Ninety Six (96) Naira)! I had no money left, but a combination of ego and stupidity made me tender my ticket for screening (not as if I really had a choice), the dude placed the Five Naira stamp on my ticket and I turned mute when I was meant to pay. Eventually someone advised I talk to the authorities and I walked up to the Station Manager of the Jos Airport who in turn referred me to the Commercial Manager.

Over two decades after, I still recall the man’s name and I am quite certain I’d pick him from a crowd till date. Mr. Sidi Abani (that’s his name) just took one look at me and the first word that came out of his mouth is ‘You are hungry’ he took me to the Staff Canteen, made sure I had a plate of pounded yam, left me in his office while he goes out to sort the problem, and ensured I got the free Airforce C-130 Plane which had limited slots for Command Secondary School Students and involved a lot of scramble.

He assigned an office assistant to carry my heavy box and I did not have to scramble. I never got to thank him enough, but I am so sure there are countless others this man went out on a limb for.

What’s the point of the story? I just painted a picture of what Jos used to be. All the man saw was a poor pre-teen in need of help, not some ‘ngbati-ngbati infidel’ (Ngbati-ngbati is a derisive term used to address those of Yoruba extraction; adapted from the penchant of the Yoruba for starting sentences with ‘It was when (Nigbati)….’ ).

Fast forward to today; If Soldiers deployed to protect citizens could look on in the face of carnage, it is about time to realize how low we have stooped as a people.

According to Wikipedia, In Greek mythology, the lotus-eaters were a race of people from an island near North Africa dominated by lotus plants. These plants provided the primary food of the island and were narcotic, causing the people to sleep in peaceful apathy.

It unnerves me that Africa was mentioned in the myth; equally unnerving is the mention of ‘narcotic’ and ‘apathy’ in one sentence.

I look at the Nigerian situation and many times, I wonder if there isn’t some Voodoo expert who has his pins stuck in Nigerian (i)dol(l)s.

Pray, tell, what is your reaction when you hear reports of the incessant wastage of lives all across the nation? I have a maxim ‘A Corpse is a Corpse till that Corpse was your Pops’ .

At the just concluded PDP Primaries, a moment of silence was held for ‘Members of our great Party’ and there was not a single mention of Jos! Except as a subliminal.............To Be Continued

Plumbline -Dead Presidents

THE BRAT CALLED DIM BANKS

I am honestly done with politeness, taking time to be pretentious about being nice while gritting my teeth in silence.

This is Rantimus; if you can’t stand the heat, just stay out of the kitchen.

On the 14th of November, 1969, a brat was unleashed on unsuspecting Nigerians and the entire world.

Let me start with his ‘enviable’ background.

His father, Suarau Olayiwola Alani Bankole is a businessman and chieftain from Ogun State. He is the Chairman of West African Aluminum Products (WAAP) Plc. He holds the Yoruba titles Oluwo of Iporo Ake and Seriki Jagunmolu of Egbaland.

This Oluwo of Iporo Ake was a staunch member of the defunct National Party of Nigeria (NPN) and contested for the gubernatorial seat, both in 1979 and 1983. He was also in the defunct NRC from 1989 and moved on to the ANPP before settling down with PDP in 2000. Anyone with a keen sense of election trends in the South-West of Nigeria would know that until the 2003 intrigue masterminded by the Ebora Owu (Daemon of Owu, a ‘city’ in Ogun State) himself, Olusegun Obasanjo (the former Head of State who, unlike George W. Bush that got Al Zaidi’s shoes coming for his face, was attacked instead by a mad man), The South-West usually voted along Progressive lines.

Matter of fact, claiming to be an ‘Awoist’ automatically earned you a seat. Even the intrigue that brought in Chief Omololu Olunloyo in Oyo State in 1983 and almost brought in Akin Omoboriowo in Ondo State was so short-lived that the attendant violence ushered in the Military and took us back for almost a Century.

Against this backdrop, if you read the Party and Bullsmilk series, it does not take a lot of convincing to know the basic ideology guiding such a Politician.

But my grouse is with his son.

A certain Hairdresser and beauty therapist, who became a Member of the House of Representatives under the platform of the Alliance for Democracy (AD) in 1999, was ‘reelected’ in 2003 shortly after switching camps to the PDP. She became the first Female Speaker of the Nigerian House of Representatives in 2007. Then came the 628 Million Naira (about US$5 million) House-Renovation/ Official Car purchase Scam and she had to resign her position. But not until in an ironical twist, Hon. Aminu Shuaibu Safana, the chairman of the house's Committee on Health and a staunch supporter of Etteh slumped and died in the heat of the Comedy of errors.

By October 30, 2007, Etteh resigned and a certain Dimeji Bankole was elected on the First of November, 2007 as Speaker, beating his contender, George Jolaoye, by 304 votes to 20 (4 abstentions). In his address, he said:

"I am taking over the mantle of leadership at a very difficult time. But these are hard times, we need to build confidence again and assure the populace that we are still their representatives. I want an independent house that Nigerians will be proud of, this is my first task."

It is extremely sad and appalling that people are not held responsible for their utterances on this side of the divide. Exactly how has Dim Banks assured us that ‘they are our representatives’? By suspending 11 members who accused him of fraud and even came up to show items allegedly purchased fraudulently under his watch before the media? Etteh went down for 628 million; Dim Banks had 52 Billion hanging on his head in the name of ‘Travel Expenses’. Messrs Onigbogi and Idahosa have been recalled, one on the alibi that he was ‘remotely’ suspended (he was in India when the incident occurred) and Idahosa on the grounds that he has now realized “every house has rules”.

Both members apologized before the committee; they have withdrawn their court actions, standing down their allegations against Dim Banks. They have been cleared, and asked to resume sitting and tender a public apology.

What apology? That they lied against Dim Banks? That is Libel! It also qualifies for Sedition, worse still, Treasonable Felony! Does that imply that the items allegedly purchased fraudulently and displayed before the Camera for us all to watch was all ‘cooked up’? Then they must be brilliant illusionists who have mastered the art of whipping up our emotions wrongly!

Alternatively, are the allegations real and they are only announcing that ‘hey, we have been starving since we got locked out’? CAN ANYBODY HEAR ME??? AM I TALKING TO MYSELF?

Anybody that believed Dim Banks on November 1, 2007 must have been under intense delusion.

Check out his educational background: From Lara Day Nursery and Primary School in Lagos, through Baptist Boys High School (1985) to ‘A’ levels in Albany college (1988), and BSc Economics, University of Reading (1991); Military Technique Strategic Studies, University of Oxford (1992), Public Finance Management, John F Kennedy School of Government, Harvard University (2005).

The simple implication of this record is that a good part of his higher cognitive life was not spent in the Country, period! The last time he really was here, before he showed up in the House of Representatives (I still stand in doubt of the NYSC discharge certificate he presented but then, who can argue against Certificate A417575, registration number FCT/FRN/97/99823 and the Orientation camp in Kubwa, Abuja? ) was in 1987/1988.

Those of you that want to vote along the lines of petty things like Age, Tribe, Religion, here is something to ponder. Dim Banks is only a Post-Independence kid. Matter of fact, he was born towards the end of the Nigerian Civil War. If he had waited a couple of months, he would have been classed as one of the ‘Kids’ of the ‘70s.

He only became the Speaker because of the PDP zoning formula which limited the Speaker to the South-West Geo-Political zone. He became the Speaker exactly two weeks to his 38^th birthday. This dude speaks the English language like he is in competition with the Queen of England! Other than that, he is as hot-headed as his command of the language.

I still recall his July scuffle with the lame-duck Governor of Ogun State, Gbenga Daniel. While I don’t really give a hoot about either of them, the fact that a seemingly innocuous commissioning took the dimensions of a Tokyo-Eleweomo-esque (go figure that) fight speaks for itself.

However, the last straw that dragged me out of the Writers’ Block is his latest remark during the House of Representatives meeting with the Presidential Task Force on Power. He was reported to have spent a record five minutes after which he ‘declared’ the work of the task force, and by extension, the Federal Government ‘null and void’

His reasons being that the road map did not have the input of the House of Representatives, nor did the government deem it necessary to consult ‘stakeholders’ before formulating the roadmap.

Who are the stakeholders? Wait for it…

Bankole stated that no consideration was being given to importers and suppliers of generators, which by his estimate is A BILLION DOLLAR INDUSTRY THAT NEEDS TO BE PROTECTED!

Could someone please shut this BRAT up before further damage is done?

PS: The Brat has a blog: http://dimejisbankole.com/

Check out music from Plumbline (Street Cleric)

PARTY AND BULL***** (CONCLUSION)

…..No one was going to stop Abacha. With possible opponents either dead, clamped in jail or on exile, the stage was set.

Until June 8.

I recall seeing the shroud wrapped around the mound that once was the most-dreaded ruler in Nigeria. The corpse was tossed in the cargo section of the plane for onward dispatch to Kano.

His successor, General Abdusalami Abubakar was all too eager to quit the scene. There was, however, one obstacle: MKO Abiola. Should his 5 year old mandate be given? Would he forgive those that ensured his incarceration and killed his wife? A dramatic twist came in when the then U.N. Secretary-General, Kofi Annan and the then Commonwealth Secretary General, Chief Emeka Anyaoku visited him in detention, and the latter addressed a press conference in Abuja saying that Abiola had given up his mandate. A quick rebuttal came through Chief Gani Fawehinmi after which another meeting came up with envoys from the United States, Mr. Thomas Pickering, Ms. Susan Rice and William Twaddel.

Abiola suddenly took ill after he was served tea by Ms Susan Rice, and after a 90 minute battle to save his life at the Presidential hospital, he was pronounced dead.

Abiola’s death would dramatically alter the course of politics of the Fourth Republic.

The ensuing transition programme was ‘designed’ to placate the South West over his death. Hence, the only presidential aspirants of South West descent contested the 1999 presidential election where Chief Obasanjo (PDP) recently released from prison won over Chief Olu Falae of the Alliance for Democracy/ All People’s Party alliance (refer to my April 1 post, Sticky Bums and Hardened Hearts).

It is my opinion that Obasanjo won because he looked more like the survival specimen of the keepers of the status quo. The dark secrets of the military looked secure with him having hung in the dark basement of the sordid past of a country desperately in need of amnesia.

The Fulani oligarchy felt safe with him, the South-East, having been played out of the APP ticket (up till this time, because the bulk of supporters of Abacha’s self-succession bid were in this party, the APP was derisively called Abacha People’s Party) when the relatively unknown Ogbonnaya Onu was picked and dumped to pick up Olu Falae, tilted towards Obasanjo’s PDP; and the South-South, probably with the hope of eventually benefiting from the PDP ‘zoning’ formula, followed suit.

The gullible religious folks swayed his way as well, since they heard he had become ‘born-again’ during his incarceration.

At the time of the election, Obasanjo was the ‘only Southerner accepted by the Northerners, the only Civilian accepted by the Military, and the only Christian accepted by Muslims’ he donated 130 million Naira, as well as several cars to his political party. For a man recently released from incarceration/death-row, that was a very questionable feat, but no one could be bothered. By May 29, 1999, most of the Retired Generals were card-carrying members of the PDP, with few ones in APP.

Perhaps this militarization of politics is the root of the sudden escalation of politically motivated killings in the Fourth Republic.

As a matter of fact, 1999 till date has the highest record of political assassinations in the history of Nigeria. September 1, 2002 would show how low we had sunk when the local branch chairman of the Nigerian Bar Association (NBA) and his wife were shot and the killers used a truck to run repeatedly over their dead bodies.

The Nigerian Police Force not only attained an apogee of incompetence, it became the order of the day that Politicians and Journalists were either killed by robbers, drug barons, or clowns.

It is interesting to note that Capital Punishment, till date, is yet to be a deterrent to crime. The establishment of Independent Corrupt Practices Commission (2000) and Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (2003) has only served to heighten despair for those interested in the fight against corruption. Billions of looted funds got resolved as ‘family matter’ in particular, when the culprit is a member of the ruling PDP. Part of what was stolen is returned in exchange for ‘soft-landing’ where the corrupt politicians upon conviction spend short terms in ‘EFCC guest-houses’ and they are released to go-and-sin-more-but-be-more-careful.

Why would a grown man, a then serving Governor, knowing the implications of libel, insist that Chief Tony Anenih wanted to kill him ‘the way they killed Chief Bola Ige’ and all of a sudden we hear nothing more?

These are the issues gnawing deep at my heart, draining my pen of every substance. By the time you are reading this, the tally of over 352 Nigerians that have died of Cholera in just 3 months would have increased. I would not even bother about the statistics of those that have been killed navigating through our ‘road-infested-potholes’ (that sounds, wrong, does it? That is the only way I can explain when you have more pot-holes than roads), nor those that have been killed since Medical Doctors embarked on Strike Action because of poor remunerations.

No, they do not matter, they are not Politicians…All we want to talk about is Zoning, Election, The-Biggest-National-Cake-Ever-Baked, Party and Bullsmilk! (Yeah, I got you on that!)