BURIED CIVILIZATION

It baffles me a great deal how artifacts abandoned by Africans based on ‘fetish’ connections found their ways to British and French museums.

Egypt had to cut ties with the Louvre Museum late last year for France to agree to return theirs.

The Nigerian case is pathetic. In 1973, General Gowon was invited to Britain and was anxious to bring a gift to say thank you for British support during the Biafran civil war. He commissioned a replica Benin bronze but was disappointed with the result. Just before his departure, he telephoned Ekpo Eyo, director of the museum, to say he was coming to choose a gift. General Gowon soon arrived; and took one of the bronzes from the display. Dr Eyo was horrified, because it was quite ‘improper for the state to be raiding the museum’. The rest is History.

For General Gowon, I would only quote Mel Gibson in the 2002 American War Film, We were Soldiers: ‘we were soldiers once…and young’ because he is one former Head of State that still gives his all to the nation, most times, I feel the Gentleman is burdened by a lot of what went wrong that he is convinced he owes the Country a lot. He was only 32!

Unfortunately, that would not be the only time the artifacts were taken away with gross impunity. As a matter of fact, the most devastating raid was the Benin ‘Punitive’ Expedition of 1897 where the Palace was looted as punishment for Benin’s preemptive strike on Lieutenant James Robert Phillips who was on his way to raid the Palace anyway. Only two British officers had survived that strike.

An estimated 2500 artifacts were ‘stolen’ and redistributed till today to British, German and French museums and private owners.

France has magnanimously returned two Monoliths. The Queen Idia Mask, used as the mascot for the Second Black Festival of Arts and Culture still sits in the basement of the British Museum.

I know we have a dark history linked with our Arts, I know that but for Mary Slessor, the people of Calabar would probably still be casting their twins into the evil forest to perish, but I KNOW that it is hypocritical to keep these artifacts that you condemned as heathen!

Okay, the Benin people are around to demand for what was taken from them, what of The Nok Terracotta? We do not even know who those people really were because they ‘mysteriously vanished’ about 200 AD. As a matter of fact, the only reason we call their arts Nok is because they were dug up in the village of Nok near the Jos Plateau region of Nigeria while some Englishman was mining for tin.

Pits dug in the search for Tin abound in Jos till date. The search for tin and artifact thus attracted settlers to the city of Jos. With an altitude of 4,062 feet (1,217 m) above sea level, it enjoys a more temperate climate than much of the rest of Nigeria (average monthly temperatures range from 70° to 77°F or 21° to 25°C). These cooler temperatures have meant that from colonial times until present day, Jos is a favourite holiday location for both tourists and expatriates based in Nigeria.

That also meant that Jos attracted a lot of immigrants.

Then arose a man called Mohammed Marwa Maitatsine; a violence disposed Cleric who was born in Cameroon. His was a quasi-Muslim fringe group that eventually sparked religious riots in Kano in 1980, and Kaduna, and Maiduguri in 1982 after police tried to control their activities. The disturbance in Kano alone resulted in the deaths of 4,177 people between December 18 and 29, 1980. He was killed by Nigerian security forces in 1980 during the Kano insurrection. His followers were able to lead several insurrections after that spanned into the late ‘80s and a good number of those fleeing for refuge found a haven in Jos, this act of hospitality looks like what turned out to be Jos’ undoing.

In 1987, religious conflict took dark dimensions when unprecedented violence between ‘Muslims’ and ‘Christians’ erupted at secondary schools and universities. Clashes at the College of Education in Kafanchan, Kaduna State, left at least twelve dead and several churches burned or damaged. The rioting spread to Zaria, Katsina, and Kano in few days. Bayero University in Kano was closed after about twenty students were injured in clashes. In Zaria, Muslim students burned the chapel at the College of Advanced Studies and attacked Christian students; the riots spilled over into the town, where more than fifty churches were burned. A curfew was imposed in Kaduna State, and outdoor processions and religious preaching were banned in Bauchi, Bendel, Benue, Borno, and Plateau states. All schools in Kaduna and five in Bauchi State closed. The then President Babangida denounced these outbreaks as "masterminded by evil men . . . to subvert the Federal Military Government." He also issued a Civil Disturbances (Special Tribunal) Decree establishing a special judicial tribunal (which would sadly be used as the instrument to hang Ken Saro Wiwa and the remaining 8 Ogoni much later under a different administration) to identify, arrest, and try those responsible, and banned preaching by religious organizations at all institutions of higher learning. In June and July 1987, Kaduna State authorities twice closed the exclusive Queen Amina College girls' high school in Zaria after clashes between Muslim and Christian students. At a particular point in time, Kaduna became irrevocably separated into a predominantly Muslim North and Christian South.

All of a sudden, Kaduna ceased to be the hotbed and the ‘axis-of-evil’ tilted to Jos. President Babangida created Jos North in 1991 and with the modified vehicle plate number scheme; the Jos North came to be represented by JJN. JJN stands for Jasawan Jos North; Jasawa is the identity of the Hausas in Jos.

The Berom, Anaguta and Afizere were the indigenous people of Jos. But with the mining industry, Hausa settlers had multiplied. With an organized system of government, The Hausa settler population in Jos had a Hausa Chief in the Tin Mine settlements (There has been a Sarkin Jos since 1902!), which they answered to. The indigenous tribe primarily the Berom felt the need to also organize themselves politically, especially after converting to Christianity. With the British system of indirect rule, a Native Chief was preferred to a Hausa Chief because of their religious and ethnic peculiarities. In 1947 the title of any Chief of Jos became Gbong Gwom Jos. Unlike the conventional thrones, it is a political throne, with no initial basis in Berom traditions as the Berom people were an ethnic group with clan-centred leadership.

The complex power-play became the keg of gunpowder that would implode later. The Jasawan had grown and were economically relevant in Jos. A generation of youth who were born in Jos and had nowhere else to call home had been born (Palestine-Israel, anyone?) and the battle for the soul of Jos-North intensified.

Islam had always been valid for Hausa mobilization. This dates back to Usman dan Fodio (1754-1817) who emerged an Amir al-Mu'minin, a political as well as religious office, consequently with authority to declare and pursue a Jihad, raise an army and become its commander. A widespread uprising consequently began in Hausaland. This uprising was largely composed of the Fulani, who held a powerful military advantage with their cavalry. It was also widely supported by the Hausa peasantry who felt over-taxed and oppressed by their rulers.

Usman dan Fodio was a great ruler and brilliant scholar whose reforms and ideals birthed the Sokoto Caliphate in 1809. As it turned out, subsequent Sultans of Sokoto automatically became Heads of the Islamic community. Unfortunately, this heritage became a tool for manipulations too. The way an American is proud of Uncle Sam is about the same way the predominantly Muslim Hausa community is proud of the Caliphate.

Alas! Clashes began to originate out of flimsy reasons like a lady walking seductively or an alleged burning of Mosques by Christians during Church Service.

Is the Jos crisis Religious? Is it Political? I will not tell beyond this backdrop. Is it utterly senseless and inhumane? To that I say an emphatic YES!

CHRONICLES OF HIBERNIA-DARK REFLECTIONS

Can I disappoint you that I will not start my first post in 2010 with the health-or-death status of President Yaradua?

Nor will I start with the soft looking brat who wanted to blow the world through his balls and the fact that secure pornography a la body scans will now be available at Nigerian Airports, simply because Nigeria is desperate to prove her innocence before ‘Almighty America’.

For all I know, the Nation has been sick longer than the President and no one has ever really bothered.

My mind is more pre-occupied with that beautiful 11-year old whose foot was trapped under the rubble in Haiti. I am thinking more of Pat Robertson of Christian Broadcasting Network who said:

"And you know, Kristi, something happened a long time ago in Haiti, and people might not want to talk about it. They were under the heel of the French, you know, Napoleon the Third and whatever, and they got together and swore a pact to the devil. They said, 'We will serve you if you'll get us free from the French.' True story. And so the devil said, 'O.K., it's a deal. And they kicked the French out, the Haitians revolted and got themselves free, and ever since they have been cursed by one thing after the other, desperately poor. That Island of Hispaniola is one island cut down the middle. On the one side is Haiti, on the other side is the Dominican Republic. Dominican Republic is prosperous, healthy, full of resorts, etc. Haiti is in desperate poverty, same islands…. "

In other words, according to him, Haiti is paying for a pact made with the devil! I would only want to know if the earthquake was selective, if churches or mosques or even the voodoo shrines were spared.

Haiti is actually paying for a pact, not made with the devil, but devils like the King of France who recognized the independence of the country in exchange for a payment of 150 million francs (an indemnity for profits lost from slave trade!). Devils that sponsored the 32 coups in Haiti’s 200 year history, devils that claimed large sums of money from the vaults of the National Bank of Haiti.

Let’s have some Chronicles:

In 1888 U.S. Marines supported a military revolt against the government.

In 1892 the German government supported suppression of the movement of Anténor Firmin (I need to read On the Equality of Human Races).

In 1912 Syrians residing in Haiti participated in a plot in which the presidential palace was destroyed.

In January 1914, British, German and United States forces entered Haiti to ‘protect’ their citizens.

The United States occupied the island from 1915 to 1934.

When the Duvaliers, Dr. François Duvalier, known as "Papa Doc" President of Haiti , 1957 –1971; Jean-Claude Duvalier ("Baby Doc"), 1971-1986 were robbing the Country silly, they were largely supported by those ‘devils’ and the high interest loans that left the Country in the state it is in today were ‘generously’ provided!

When Jean Bertrand Aristide began asking France for reparation, that was when ‘corruption’ accusations came in, a rebellion ensued, and the US Marines, yes US Marines helped him on exile (Aristide himself said he was kidnapped).

So, really, I agree with Pat Robertson to an extent.

This Reparation thingie reminds me so much of the late Chief MKO Abiola; Nigerians! You are not likely to know the true story behind the annulment of the June 12 1993 Presidential Elections in this life, probably in the life to come, you stand a chance.

That was a digression.

Haitians were the first ‘Free’ Blacks, then Ethiopia, then Liberia. What do they have to show for it?

Ethiopia had Emperor Haile Selassie I, the man who played a vital role in the formation of the disbanded Organization of African Unity (OAU), which was replaced in 2002 by the African Union (AU). I don’t want to bring the Rastafarian part to this, but this man was kicked out and replaced by a wonderful tyrant: Mengistu Haile Mariam.

Liberia had William Tolbert Jr., I won’t call him a saint, and neither will I call him a sinner, but a US Army Special Force trained Samuel Kanyon Doe, had Tolbert murdered in his sleep and became the President of Liberia, which began the dark journey of Liberia through a brutal civil war, and the unleashing of Charles Taylor upon the people of Liberia. Charles Taylor would later allege he was raised by the CIA.

Thomas Sankara! The man who sold most of the government fleet of Mercedes cars and made the Renault 5 (the cheapest car sold in Burkina Faso at that time) the official service car of the ministers, converted the army's provisioning store in Ouagadougou into a state-owned supermarket open to everyone (the first supermarket in the country), was killed by Blaise Compaoré . This man still rules Burkina Faso till today! It is interesting that it was Thomas Sankara that changed the name of the Country from Upper Volta to Burkina Faso (the land of upright people).

Today, Burkina Faso occupies the sixth to last place on the Human Development Index.

If Patrice Lumumba had not been taken down by the CIA, would Mobutu have risen to rob that Zaire (name given by Mobutu)/ Democratic Republic of Congo silly?

For Nigeria, I will only say that someday, the ‘Classified Information’ will become declassified.

My heart goes out to Haiti; my heartfelt appreciation goes out to those who have raised funds, regardless of Race or Religion, for that Country, whose heroic efforts began the process for the end of Slavery and Paleo-Colonization.

Embattled Tiger Woods still got a $ 3 million donation out, Hollywood actors/actresses, Artists like Wyclef are reaching out, while Messrs ‘I-just-emerged-from-closed-door-meetings-with-God’ tell them that it is God’s punishment for them; Job sure has Miserable Comforters!

LETTERS FROM JERUSALEM

Honestly, I am fed up of getting angry at those stereotyping Nigerians as scammers.

Now, let’s talk, Talakawa, let’s talk, and when we’re done talking, should your ‘up-before-the-cock-crows-hop-into-my-work clothes-hard-earned’ cash go into the hands of scammers, ‘imma whup your butt real bad!!!’

Three hundred grand got moved from a friend’s account, and it hurts so bad.

The Robin Hood theory is beginning to nauseate real bad. I could understand Charles Davis Jr. (Abiodun Oyewole of The Last Poets)’s passion when he robbed the KKK to assist fellow revolutionaries (even though I have serious issues with two wrongs making a right), what I will never understand is the silly ‘reparation-by-fraud’ doctrine.

My reasons are clear, and I will illustrate with this: when the former-CBN-Governor-turned-Guber-Aspirant’s father was kidnapped, I felt sorry for the people of Anambra State, in particular if the ransom got paid. I hereby submit that the ransom is Anambra’s coffers ‘Cash-Advance’ in the event of the subject’s emergence as the Governor of the State.

The dilemma of the 21st Century Robin Hood is that when he robs the rich, the rich go out to re-rob the poor!

With sufficient whistle blowing, Letters from Jerusalem (the ancestor of the Nigerian Letter) and all cognate forms are beginning to lose popularity, people hardly reply those fraudulent mails, and so, the Con Man went back to the drawing board.

Electronic mails and Short Message Service (SMS) messages notifying prospective dumbos about lotteries-they-never-played-but-won and somehow, people parted with call-credit recharge vouchers among many other things; even in the dictionary, greed precedes gullibility!

Alas! Like the late Christopher Wallace (BIG) would have said, “Things done changed”. The game has moved up another notch and you don’t need to be a simpleton to qualify.

The Automated Teller Machine (ATM) cards got compromised sometime last year and people started receiving alerts of ‘unsolicited withdrawals’ on their behalf. Some lodged complaints at the banks; I even have a friend who, while lodging the complaint, his ATM card in hand, the withdrawals continued right before the Customer Care staff! I personally do not think the friend in question has the gift of telekinesis; and if he did, his ATM card, to the best of my knowledge is not operated remotely, so, what really went down?

The ATM card has a magnetic stripe which contains routing data only. All personal information is encrypted through Triple DES (Data Encryption Standard) which is near impossible to crack; BUT that magnetic stripe data can be copied and used to print out duplicate cards and with the availability of cheap spy cameras, your PIN can be read!

I have seen people leave their ATM receipts behind, thinking it is of no use; just how dumb do we want to be? The debit card details are obviously on the slips for goodness sake!

I am trying hard to keep my manners here; ATTENTION SHOPPING FREAKS! You sure feel good swiping your cards over those P.O.S (Point of Sale) terminals, and you quickly punch your PIN and then, your account seems inaccessible, then you use another P.O.S. terminal and then it works, and you heave a sigh of relief. Can I scare you for a minute? What if you just punched over a card-reader? You think it is impossible? Go on and search!

What beats me is the seeming failure of the Economic Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) to put a check on these activities. I know you’d say they are not magicians, I am not asking them to flip any wand either. What baffles me is why, in spite of the fact that these machines have cameras that take pictures (which has come in handy in resolving some cases), pictures of these ‘unsolicited withdrawers’ have not made centre-spread of Newspapers, IDEAS, ANYONE???!!!

Now you can all breathe easy. No one needs to come after your cards anymore. Thanks to Phishing (pronounced fishing) and e-mail spoofing, a mail can come straight into your inbox allegedly from your bank, using your bank’s actual e-mail ID!

Here is an example (I have edited the link so you would not end up clicking the URL and ruin things for me):

Dear customer,

During our regularly scheduled account maintenance and verification procedures, we have detected a slight error in your account information.

This might be due to either of the following reasons:

1. A recent change in your personal information (i.e. change of address).
2. Submitting invalid information during the initial sign up process.
3. An inability to accurately verify your selected option of payment due to an internal error within our automated teller machine (ATM) processors.

Please update and verify your information by clicking the link below:

https://ebank.iremovedthenameofthebankforobviousreasons.com/netbanking/

If your account information is not updated within 48 hours then your ability to access your account will become restricted.

Note: Username (Account Number) and Password are numeric. Refer to your e-banking signup form.

Thank you

· Please do not respond to this email as your reply will not be received.

The irony of it all is that the URL is https, which is supposed to be secure! My friend followed a link like this and he was led to a well designed web-portal that even looks more authentic than the cheap versions the banks have themselves. He entered his details, and Bingo! He had sold his account’s soul to hell-hole! In less than 24hrs, he was 300 grand (in Naira) poorer than the previous day!

Verve cards which are meant to be more secure are taking over from the magnetic-strip based ATM cards, people are getting more careful about giving information online, and if you are still careless enough to use cyber-cafes and you don’t clear your browsing history and delete all cookies, the cookies will morph into dookie on your plate!

Backtrack to Sweden, January 2008.

A bank employee noticed that the mouse pointer on his system was moving by it self. He then quickly looked behind the computer and finally found under his desk a hidden device that was connected to the computer to remotely control his computer. Pulling the cables stopped a transfer of several million Swedish Kronor!

Nigerians did not notice, sorry, the average Nigerian did not notice. November 2009, Ekerette Esennubong Obot, Kayode Ogunmolade, Dele Ige, and Olanrewaju Ipaye were arrested following a tip-off from a bank official. The official was approached to help connect a particular hardware: Key Loggers

You heard that before? This is what it does:

It tracks the keys struck on a keyboard, typically in a covert manner so that the person using the keyboard is unaware that their actions are being monitored! Those boys came with hardware, but there are software versions of it that can be installed on your computer, even without your direct permission.

The scammers may use spam emails with attachment, pop-up ads, applications with malicious codes, free gaming and porn sites. The scammer may lure you to click the acceptance button of any so-called free software in order to let his logger creep into your system and start spying. The user will never know that something is settling on his system as the loggers are generally hidden and are usually considered safe by antivirus software applications and firewalls.

Key loggers have certain options like the hide-mode, where no icon is visible in the applications list. They can rename any executable file and change registry entries.

Do I need to say more? All you Bluetooth activators in ‘free-trade zones’…. DO I REALLY NEED TO TELL YOU ANYTHING ELSE?

The Slave Ships

Mr. Rainhargt Fleischer, an expatriate German technician of Julius Berger Plc, in the course of supervising the maintenance of a part of the Nigerian Senate building, kicked a Nigerian in the crotch so hard that the guy slipped into coma; and so freaking what???

We’ve all been and we still are kicked daily in the groin and that explains why we have been so unproductive.

The Berlin 1884-1885 Scramble for Africa will definitely not be the last time Africa will be up for sales in absentia; Slavery will never be confined the annals of history. The same way old fashion trends get recycled, the same way the Master-Slave relationship reincarnates with different names. Racism is alive, and to think otherwise is to believe the KKK is now admitting Blacks!

When Ahmadinejad allegedly denied the Holocaust ever took place, the whole world felt he was insensitive to the annihilation of 6 million Jews, but I would like to find out if any figure has been given till date on the number of African children killed in the name of vaccination! Pfizer’s Trovan experiment in Northern Nigeria would make Hitler’s SS Doctors green with envy because it will never be recorded as a war crime, nor as genocide, but what is it, really?

I am one of those with the conviction that the Union Jack would not have been lowered had the Oil discovery in Oloibiri been much earlier than 1958. Alas! Several other flags, each with trademark Skull and Crossbones have taken random turns to signal the handing over of the rudder to Pirates of various races and cultures.

With the bulk of Nigerian engineering graduates ending up as bankers and the ones in cognate fields working in multinational companies not having actual exposure to jealously guarded ‘trade secrets’ of such companies, is it not obvious we are programmed to self-destruct?

I weep each day I see the Julius Berger Blue Maria (for want of better connotation for that truck with makeshift cabin) conveying construction workers to site. I see these hapless people even exhibiting territorial behavior, their gular folds rising when fellow-slaves-who-do-not-belong-to-our-camp try to hop in for a free-ride.

It beats me for a Company committed to “the observance of all Health, Safety and Environment requirements in accordance with international practice”! This is why I personally do not believe the so called Neo-Nazi; there is nothing new about it at all, as a matter of fact, most of these taskmasters will out-perform Hitler, Period!

"We feel that serious consideration should be given to workers' welfare. To convey workers in the kind of containers that we have seen Julius Berger do over the years is deplorable and condemnable. In this 21st century, we feel that workers should be better treated.

This issue of using containers has been discussed over time. It is disappointing that up till now, the practice has not stopped. The Senate Committee on Labour will take serious action on this matter when we reconvene.” - Senator Wilson Ake

That was August 2, 2008.

Who remembers the 2006 indictment and shutdown of Julius Berger Pharmacies in connection with the sale of fake drugs which were imported from Sinochem Ningbo, a Chinese company blacklisted by NAFDAC, and the discriminatory and unethical practice of dispensing fake/substandard drugs to Nigerians and reserving quality ones for expatriates? I have always believed this Nation suffers from mass amnesia!

This is a Company, allegedly said to be indigenous since the purchase of 51% of its stake leaving only 49% stake with Bilfinger Berger Germany, with a Nigerian Chairman, that still segregates Nigerian staff! WE HAVE A PROBLEM!!!

Why would a drug banned in the United States become the right drug to treat children with meningitis? And how on earth were these drugs tested without verification? With all the ‘indigenization’ of pharmaceutical companies in Nigeria, how come no company has set up a basic active raw material manufacturing plant in Nigeria, not even for Paracetamol or Aspirin? Does it come as a surprise anymore, then, that any online search you do on the origin of HIV/AIDS now points to ‘Sub-Saharan Africa’?

Let me move on. I remember a seminar a presented as an undergraduate on Oil-Shale as an alternative energy source. When it was time for questions, I recall a lecturer asking me why we should bother about an ‘Alternative Energy Source’ when we still have the Oil. If only they knew how close we are to exhausting our reserves!

What are we going to do when that day dawns? Who are those that will spearhead the drive to enhance our own technology? Those engineers that have been condemned to the claustrophobia-inducing four walls of the banking sector? The ones in the Oil companies who know next to diddly when it comes to the actual operations?

I find what we call ‘indigenous companies’ extremely laughable. One crony of the same set of soldiers that took Nigeria down this lane with the 1966 (add another 6 to get the mark of the beast that they are) ‘counter-coup’ gets the Oil Block which he knows nothing about, he brings in another stooge who pretends to know anything about it, the stooge brings in a ‘foreign partner’ who pretends to know nothing till he’s done milking everybody dry! Phew!

Do you see what I see? The Western Pirates have been identified, so we looked out to welcome the Asian sailors. What we fail to do is look closely at all the flags….because if we did; the only thing we were meant to see in the first place is Skulls and Crossbones! Ubangiji Kiyaye!!!

MY RESIGNATION

Dear All,

They said counting imaginary sheep jumping over a pen is a cure for insomnia.

But tonight, I won’t be counting sheep; I would be counting the number of Nigerian journalists murdered on a Sunday.

Should that be insufficient, I would count all murdered Nigerian journalists and add the geometrically progressive list of unresolved murders since the blasting away of Dele Giwa of Newswatch on the 19^th of October 1986. It was on a Sunday.

I closed my eyes, instead of seeing sheep jumping over a pen, I saw Abayomi Ogundeji, Godwin Agbroko, Omololu Falobi, Bagauda Kaltho, Tunde Oladepo, Krees Imodibie , Tayo Awotusin….why should those who live by the Pen die by the Gun?

Is it hate, or the desire to instill terror that motivated those who killed an Assistant Editor of The Guardian newspapers, Mr. Bayo Ohu on September 20, 2009? Why did they use the caliber of bullets that will make an elephant beg to die voluntarily?

Freedom of Speech is not a myth in Nigeria; however, this ‘freedom’ has a conjoined twin: Freedom to be suicidal!

On this note, I tender my resignation, details of which I shall give later. I want to make every moment count because things will never be the same again.

The Pen is a Penitentiary. You are sentenced without the right to any hearing at all; you just get up one day and discover you are in it. The Pen has made many rich; at the expense of the prisoner everybody calls the ‘Gifted Writer’ because he is more than often the poor victim trapped within this Pen to the extent he lives in Penury!

The pen is that Pendant that hung on Frodo the Hobbit’s neck (Lord of the Rings, anyone?), the ring of Sauron that weighs heavily on the bearer and often brings him to an unwilling fate…is this a rant, or some feeble attempt at Poetry? Could this really be coming from Plumbtifex Rantimus, the Prolific Priest of the Proles?

Is there anybody that really wants to die?

My submission is that even the suicide bomber has to be ‘rightly motivated’ to make the prospect more appealing; from the promise to have wide-eyed houris at your beck-and-call in the hereafter to the promise to take care of the martyr’s family in the all too certain event of his/her demise.

So what is the motivation for the man of the pen?

Is it the take-home peanuts from the boss that knows next to diddly about journalism? Or the ‘job satisfaction’ of putting up a ‘masterpiece’ that went over the heads of the numb audience like one of those KKK hoods? Could it be the knowledge that promises that more than often go unfulfilled will be made to your widow and fatherless kids (if you had them before you got dispatched) and you will be mourned on the pages of the same papers that drank your ink while you were at it and eventually made the sand-macadam-rug-anyothersurface drink your blood? Or, the fact that even those that hired the assassins will mourn you publicly and the Police will blame it on armed robbers (an indirect way of telling the ‘numb audience’ that your case is closed long before your casket was)?

Even the Average Nigerian Coward (ANC) knows he’s going to die someday; his only problem is that he desires to hang on a little bit, sing some more Te Deum Laudamus, gripe in silence a little more about how bad things are, hoping things will change by some stroke of design. Need I also add that he doesn’t want to go violently?

For those that are wont to profile people based on their nationality (a safer way to be racist and get away with it) and tribal affiliations, Bayo Ohu throws a poser to you all.

If you followed my previous post, you will realize I admitted that more often than not, the Yoruba tribe in Nigeria fits more into the ‘ANC’ mould. Now, among the Yoruba, a man from Oyo is seen as the one who prefers to say ‘the absence of pigmentation’ instead of ‘White’. An Oyo man is perceived the king of cowards (and consequently treachery) among those that are generally perceived as cowards.

Bayo Owu was an Oyo man, and he DID NOT fit that bill. That is an aside anyway.

I recall the irony of a late Nigerian Army General who, when asked if he actually begged a subordinate (lying prostrate on the floor) for his dear life, responded “I will not deny that I begged, at least I am still useful to somebody today” he eventually died shortly afterwards as a result of a ghastly motor accident. I couldn’t help wondering if getting two to four more years is a good bargain for a perpetual reputation as a coward (oh, I forgot the man once governed Oyo State!).

In any case, plotting a coup (phantom or not) tells me that the culprit is fully aware of the risks, and the pecuniary gains of a success scenario is what we can all attest to (if in doubt, ask Babangida or Obasanjo). So, what is the pecuniary gain inherent in being a writer? You would be quick to mention J. K. Rowling (the Harry Potter dude), James Patterson or Stephen King, and I will be quick to tell you that even a vendor can be a millionaire.

That explains why pen men are taking government appointments with all their soul.

What are the viable options in a Country where a business man whose sole contribution to the Country is installing and uninstalling Governors like they are some driver software, has twenty five (25) Police Aides (and I could swear those 25 would have lobbied for the ‘lucrative’ job)! To think the Federal Executive Government had the nerve to announce the withdrawal of security detail to Nigerian judges (I don’t give a hoot if there was a change in position on that)!

In a Country of jumbled priorities, I hereby announce MY RESIGNATION.

I resign to my destiny and purpose in life and I embrace it with all of my heart. I resign to the Penitentiary that the Pen (and lately the keyboard of this HP that is fast wearing out my finger-print) has locked me in, the solitary confines of my Brain Cells with myriads of ticks in my head. I resign to the burden that this Pendant is. Should I come out of the Pen to live in a resplendent mansion, complete with a Penthouse, should my Pen become so powerful that even the entire defense resource of the Pentagon can’t withstand, I am bound to it, bound to the inspiration that moves my ink.

Why then should I continue to fight it? I RESIGN!